This woke me up about a week ago and I feel compelled to share this strange saga.
Announcer: And now folks, live from Las Vegas, Nevada it's the Las Vegas Bowl with our A team of announcers Brent Mussberger, Lou Holtz and Dickie V! And now heres Brent.
Brent: A warm Holiday greeting from the Entertainment Capital of America Las Vegas.
Lou: Yes Bwent, gweetings to awl our friends.
Dickie V: Brent A roonie, It's great really super duper P-T-P time great to be here. I'm talkin Prime Time Players Bay-BEEE!!
Brent: Well Todays matchup presents Utah vs. Boise State. Utah looks awfully big. But Boise State is the prohibitive favorite.
Lou: Speaking of Big, you don't get any bigger dan the Fighting Irish of Notre Dame. If da point spread was based on character, Notre Dame would be three touchdown favorites in every game.
Brent: You know Las Vegas is sure the place where people have alot of fun. Now it's a family destination. And now, a favorite of our pre game, Professor Lou's pep talk to the Underdog Utah Utes.
Lou: Now Boyz, look heh, your gonna go out on the field today, and nobody past the Wahsatch Mountain range is gonna give you a snowballs chance in hell. But when you put on dose golden helmets...oh wait your colors are red...when you put on dose red helmets and jerseys think of Ara Parseghian and Knute Wockne. Dats what I tole all the boys and it seemed to work... come to tink of it, thats what I told em at South Carolina after I left Notre Dame.
The I-Wish are playing tonight Wight??
Brent: Thanks professor, you hit it right on the head as usual. Las Vegas is a fun place to go on a holiday. And now here's a special feature, Dickie V in a pre game pep talk in the Boise Locker Room.
Dickie V: You know daddyo, I was at the Paris playin the tables the other day when who walks in but the man himself. I'm talkin baby about Robert Montgomery Knight the Legend baby the legend. And he gave me some good advice that I'm gonna give you tonight and you take it with you win lose or draw. This is advice I've heard from the friggin General himself. He said "Dickie V, you chrome domed son of a gun, if you have to be that close to the side line my teams gonna play in sunglasses so they don't lose sight of the ball coming off that damn chrome dome cue ball of yours". And the general himself, the greatest coach every since my ole friend Jimmy Naismith, told his team to wear sunglasses and that game baby will go down in history as a game changer. So Boise, wear your shades under those helmets. I wont be on the sideline tonight but if some bald guy is, you will have a great advantage. Plus you win style points Bay Bee, and style over substance is always what it's about. Now go out there and play...and good luck against those Dookies BABY, coach K will have them ready. He's got the PTP ers baby...Prime Time Players Daddyo-A Rooni. Vegas Bay Bee, where I used to hang out Frankie and Dino and my favorite little point guard of all time, Sammy Davis Jr. BABY...You talk about PTP.
Brent: Dickie, thanks but they are playing the Utah Utes. But nevertheless good advice. Las Vegas is a place where thousands of people get married each year.
Lou: Bwent, Boise is weally having a big speed advantage today. And Notre Dame will have the size.
Brent: That's Utah coach. Look at that Show Girl. They have show girls in Vegas.
Dickie: Look at those Unies BABY. Boise has the orange and blue. Just like my buddy's old uni's TRT...I'm talkin Timothy Richard Tebow. The greatest college player in the history of the sport Daddy -O...the original PTP er. I was talkin with Florida Head basketball coach Billy Donovan just the other day baby and he is good now, but his incoming class is LOADED baby with a capital L. And Tebow will soon be the MVP in the NFL baby. Mile High City watch out baby...Can you say Super Bowl City with multiple rings coming BABY. TRT in the house.
Brent: Las Vegas is the fun capital of the World....WAIT watch out, the Generals in the booth with a folding chair.
Dickie- Robert Montgomery Knight BABY.
Knight: (Hitting Dickie V over the head with a folding chair and grabbing the microphone from Brent. The General is in a red sweater with a big white I on it.) "Now look you punks, I was sent here as a representative of people everywhere to pull the plug on this team. Dickie, everyone is sick of your hype and your myopic favoritism to Duke basketball. They are great and don't need you as a mouthpiece. You're in the Basketball Hall of Fame?? There are great coaches out there that have toiled and deserve to be put in instead a hyped up gas bag like you. Plus Tebow's a great kid, but how about a little love for other players who are tons better like Sam Bradford. Professor, you are retired. Nobody cares about every team being compared to Notre Dame. Mark May is a smart man, but you've made him look like a genius one time too many. And Brent, you are being banished to being the announcer for Olympic Curling and the annual paint drying compitition in Pittsville Alabama. These will be the only times you will be allowed on TV. These venues will serve your sacchirine broadcasting style well. An oyster in a closed shell could bring more excitement to these games than you. You're saving grace was you were good for a nap...as in you put the whole audience to sleep. I'm taking over this booth and all the big games. I'll be the color man, and now here's the new voice of all sports on every network, my new partner and lead man on the network, Howard Stern".
And then I woke up in a cold sweat yet somehow happy with the new world of sports broadcasting.
Saturday, December 25, 2010
Sunday, December 19, 2010
What the NCAA and Cam Newton Affair Taught Me
It was at an AAU tournament called the Mac Irvin in Chicago years ago that an AAU coach told me "these kids from Chicago ain't stupid. They know what they're worth." The late great Art Tolis once told me "if you think basketball recruiting is a rat race, it's nothing compared to football."
With that in mind, I'm pretty sure Cam Newton isn't stupid and he probably has an idea of what he is worth. The NCAA is a business and they did not want any possibility of TCU or Boise State in a potential BCS championship game. So it's one day you're ineligible, no wait you're eligible. You didn't know what was happening it was all your daddy.
Now, I will never know what actually happened, if anything really did in fact happen. There sure was a ton of smoke. BUT, if something did happen, how was this much different from Reggie Bush. His parents got the money and Cam Newtons' parents allegedly got the money. Reggie Bushes mistake was not paying the agent back the borrowed money. It has cost USC dearly...ramrodded by a Nebraska AD who had an agenda.
Speaking of Nebraska, I was at the first ever Cornhusker basketball Tourney a way back when with Ron Godfreys fabulous Miami Hurricanes. My first thoughts were why would anyone want to play at this ice box tundra. Why don't players want to come to Miami and warm weather schools where winters are nice. It looks like kids have finally gotten smart.
I know big name schools have been penalized in the past. The over-riding theme seems to be if you are an up and comer and start beating the big boys too often watch out. A couple points in fact are Jacksonville University. They got squaushed like a bug because it just ain't right beating the Seminoles and Gators. Check out Pony Excess on 30 by 30 on ESPN. SMU got the death penalty in sports for doing what Auburn and Southern Cal are getting caught doing. In fact, they were doing what every University in Texas was doing...they were probably just a little more flamboyant about it. SMU had the nerve to beat Texas. Houston used to have the nerve to beat Texas and they got exiled to Conference USA to play Army and tons of other teams that are a total disconnect from the days of playing Texas and A and M every year. Now Texas doesn't have to worry about SMU getting all the good players from Dallas and Houston getting all the good players from Houston and getting pounded iby those teams. Texas can conveniently avoid playing those schools every year because they have been effectively squashed. In the movie Pony Excess it is quite amusing with all the people who say "I hate Texas." America is a land of bandwagoning front runners and in Texas everyone is generally for Texas (except the Aggies) because Texas is the 800 pound gorilla that generally wins and dominates. It doesn't seem that long ago, but it was, when Houston pounded Texas in Austin 66-15. With a little help from their friends, Texas doesn't have to worry about that happening any longer. The NCAA can solve the Boise State problem really easy. Trump up some charges and put them on probation. That way they won't get the chance to beat an Oklahoma and destroy the BCS hoedown.
With that in mind, I'm pretty sure Cam Newton isn't stupid and he probably has an idea of what he is worth. The NCAA is a business and they did not want any possibility of TCU or Boise State in a potential BCS championship game. So it's one day you're ineligible, no wait you're eligible. You didn't know what was happening it was all your daddy.
Now, I will never know what actually happened, if anything really did in fact happen. There sure was a ton of smoke. BUT, if something did happen, how was this much different from Reggie Bush. His parents got the money and Cam Newtons' parents allegedly got the money. Reggie Bushes mistake was not paying the agent back the borrowed money. It has cost USC dearly...ramrodded by a Nebraska AD who had an agenda.
Speaking of Nebraska, I was at the first ever Cornhusker basketball Tourney a way back when with Ron Godfreys fabulous Miami Hurricanes. My first thoughts were why would anyone want to play at this ice box tundra. Why don't players want to come to Miami and warm weather schools where winters are nice. It looks like kids have finally gotten smart.
I know big name schools have been penalized in the past. The over-riding theme seems to be if you are an up and comer and start beating the big boys too often watch out. A couple points in fact are Jacksonville University. They got squaushed like a bug because it just ain't right beating the Seminoles and Gators. Check out Pony Excess on 30 by 30 on ESPN. SMU got the death penalty in sports for doing what Auburn and Southern Cal are getting caught doing. In fact, they were doing what every University in Texas was doing...they were probably just a little more flamboyant about it. SMU had the nerve to beat Texas. Houston used to have the nerve to beat Texas and they got exiled to Conference USA to play Army and tons of other teams that are a total disconnect from the days of playing Texas and A and M every year. Now Texas doesn't have to worry about SMU getting all the good players from Dallas and Houston getting all the good players from Houston and getting pounded iby those teams. Texas can conveniently avoid playing those schools every year because they have been effectively squashed. In the movie Pony Excess it is quite amusing with all the people who say "I hate Texas." America is a land of bandwagoning front runners and in Texas everyone is generally for Texas (except the Aggies) because Texas is the 800 pound gorilla that generally wins and dominates. It doesn't seem that long ago, but it was, when Houston pounded Texas in Austin 66-15. With a little help from their friends, Texas doesn't have to worry about that happening any longer. The NCAA can solve the Boise State problem really easy. Trump up some charges and put them on probation. That way they won't get the chance to beat an Oklahoma and destroy the BCS hoedown.
Friday, December 17, 2010
What's In A Number?
What's in a number. If you ever go to Jeff Sagarin on a search engine such as google, you would be surprised.
I was watching UCLA play Villanova the a few weeks back and again I was blown away. Unfortunately it wasn't because they were the awesome team UCLA fans expect. They just looked way below average to be wearing the blue and gold. Their number is 141. Yes, UCLA is calculated at the 141st best basketball team in America. That sort of has me puzzled. How a good player from anywhere could walk away from that campus and not be awestruck is beyond comprehension. It is a gorgeous school with everything a young man could desire including incredible weather. Now when you look at all the players in the pros from Ben Howlands first UCLA teams, you almost have to wonder why they didn't win it all. I used to look at those teams and wonder why he pulled the reigns so hard on the race horses that played for him.
While we're talking about the Bruins here is another number...61. That's where the football Bruins rank. Oregon out recruits the Bruins by leaps and bounds. I guess the Nike money talks. One last crazy football number...24. Arizona State is ranked as the 24th best football team in the country. They went 6-6 and are not eligible for a bowl because one of the wins was against a Division IAA. Okay, one final thought...the number one....The Pac 10 Conference is number one by a hair over the SEC, followed closely by the Big 12. Then there is a dropoff to the Big 10. These numbers are subject to change after the bowl games. Who'd of thunk it?
On the basketball side here's another crazy number most people won't recognize...the number 2 as in BYU. BYU is the number 2 power rated team in the country behind Duke. And on the West Coast, Steve Fisher has San Diego State at number 7. Would you have guessed those numbers? BYU's long range number is 6, as in 6th best in the whole nation. I'm betting outside of Utah that's a pretty well kept secret.
***********************************************************
Some teams have it and some teams don't. I've been watching the Boston Celtics and the NBA for over 50 years. The Knicks Celtics game a couple nights ago was typical. The Celtics hit one at the buzzer to win it. They have mostly been hitting that same shot for the last 50 years. Some franchises seem blessed.
Speaking of the Knicks, they are a great team to watch. Raymond Felton has been reborn when the Bobcats traded him. What were they thinking replacing him with DJ Augustin? Larry Brown has this throng of admirerers. I would never say he is not a great coach. I believe there are a number of them better in the NBA. Jackson, Pop, Riley when he coaches, McMillan, Addleman, Karl,Rivers and maybe even D'Antoni to name a few. A point guard has to be just right for coach Brown or he will nag him to death. Also, he couldn't deal with youth on the one Olympic team he coached and it was not a pretty result, even with a younger Tim Duncan. In fact, that team prompted the advent of the Olympic basketball team as we now know it....organized and winners.
I was watching UCLA play Villanova the a few weeks back and again I was blown away. Unfortunately it wasn't because they were the awesome team UCLA fans expect. They just looked way below average to be wearing the blue and gold. Their number is 141. Yes, UCLA is calculated at the 141st best basketball team in America. That sort of has me puzzled. How a good player from anywhere could walk away from that campus and not be awestruck is beyond comprehension. It is a gorgeous school with everything a young man could desire including incredible weather. Now when you look at all the players in the pros from Ben Howlands first UCLA teams, you almost have to wonder why they didn't win it all. I used to look at those teams and wonder why he pulled the reigns so hard on the race horses that played for him.
While we're talking about the Bruins here is another number...61. That's where the football Bruins rank. Oregon out recruits the Bruins by leaps and bounds. I guess the Nike money talks. One last crazy football number...24. Arizona State is ranked as the 24th best football team in the country. They went 6-6 and are not eligible for a bowl because one of the wins was against a Division IAA. Okay, one final thought...the number one....The Pac 10 Conference is number one by a hair over the SEC, followed closely by the Big 12. Then there is a dropoff to the Big 10. These numbers are subject to change after the bowl games. Who'd of thunk it?
On the basketball side here's another crazy number most people won't recognize...the number 2 as in BYU. BYU is the number 2 power rated team in the country behind Duke. And on the West Coast, Steve Fisher has San Diego State at number 7. Would you have guessed those numbers? BYU's long range number is 6, as in 6th best in the whole nation. I'm betting outside of Utah that's a pretty well kept secret.
***********************************************************
Some teams have it and some teams don't. I've been watching the Boston Celtics and the NBA for over 50 years. The Knicks Celtics game a couple nights ago was typical. The Celtics hit one at the buzzer to win it. They have mostly been hitting that same shot for the last 50 years. Some franchises seem blessed.
Speaking of the Knicks, they are a great team to watch. Raymond Felton has been reborn when the Bobcats traded him. What were they thinking replacing him with DJ Augustin? Larry Brown has this throng of admirerers. I would never say he is not a great coach. I believe there are a number of them better in the NBA. Jackson, Pop, Riley when he coaches, McMillan, Addleman, Karl,Rivers and maybe even D'Antoni to name a few. A point guard has to be just right for coach Brown or he will nag him to death. Also, he couldn't deal with youth on the one Olympic team he coached and it was not a pretty result, even with a younger Tim Duncan. In fact, that team prompted the advent of the Olympic basketball team as we now know it....organized and winners.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)